Hear me moan,
You’re in the middle of a dungeon. You can clearly see the key above your head, encased in a prison of glass. There’s a steam-powered piston sitting dormant in the dungeon wall. You know you have to power up the piston so that it punches out and shatters the glass – you’ve never been so sure in your entire life – but 30 minutes later your fingers and brain hurt and you’re still standing in the dungeon thinking, “what the fuck do I do?!”
I Have No Idea What I’m Doing Gamer Dog
And there’s only one thing to do…
You turn to Youtube, find a walkthrough and scream in frustration when some asshole makes it look simple. In fact, you punch yourself in the genitals and carve ‘why didn’t I think of that?’ into your arm.
You mop up the blood and sink into a chair with a bag of frozen peas on your lap and you let the shame wash over you. You let the shame seep into every crevice of your being where it’ll fester like ringworm, and when the shame consumes you, well, you’ll never play a game blind ever again.
Just kidding – there’s no shame in using walkthroughs. Actually, using a walkthrough for one game doesn’t mean you’ll use a walkthrough for every game. Walkthroughs aren’t only used to help you through difficult situations either. Achievement Hunters and Trophy Hunters will use them during or after finishing a game to mop up the milestones put in place by the developers.
Walkthroughs can be marvellous tools at our disposal but I hate them. I hate having to resort to them. They make me feel less intelligent. They make me feel like I’m cheating. They make me feel embarrassed.
And most of all, they make me feel furious – especially when I’ve been able to solve earlier puzzles that seemed infinitely more challenging. There is nothing more rewarding in a videogame than conquering adversity but walkthroughs take that away from you.
I also hate how at least one of you right now is thinking “just get better at games” but that isn’t the problem. Once you’ve ran out of ideas how is improving your cognitive skills in the game going to help? It probably helps in a more action-orientated game but it won’t do you any favours in a physics-based puzzler.
I will never abstain from using walkthroughs though. As much as I hate them, and as much as I hate to admit it, I will always need them in my life – similar to vegetables, I suppose.
Pixel Vegetables Fruit
Want to retaliate? Post a comment. I lament once a week but you can follow me on Twitter @LeeLaments where I moan every day.